The Many Faces of Resistance: How to Spot and Transform What’s Really Keeping Your Business From Thriving

rsz_5resistance_pushing (2)When I was in my early 20s, I spent almost two weeks in bed paralyzed with fear about a pending six-month backpacking trip to Europe, wondering if I should postpone or cancel it. As it was an independent trip where I would be travelling for three months alone (and the rest of the time with my boyfriend), I was petrified about all the uncertainties. Where would I stay? How would I get around? How would I make my backpacker’s budget stretch over six months? I had never gone on such an extensive trip and had never been to countries where English was not the native language.

I went ahead with the trip as planned and, of course, everything not only worked out fine … everything worked out fabulously! I had a blast, and I absolutely loved travelling as a backpacker. It was one of the best things I ever did, as well as subsequent trips.

Thankfully, since that time, I’ve never had to spend a few weeks in bed due to anxiety. Yet, I have experienced numerous other situations where I’ve felt vulnerable and terrified about doing something that felt “risky” and uncertain, including creating two businesses. What I’ve learned (and continue to learn) is how to spot and work through the fears driving different resistant patterns and behaviours that can affect me and my business growth.

From my own experiences and witnessing my clients’ journeys, I’ve been able to discern how the different faces of resistance manifest and their common effects. When these patterns are left unaddressed, they can keep you in a suspended state, avoiding the inspired actions that will allow you and your business to thrive or cause you to take these actions half-heartedly or ineffectively. Ultimately, unresolved resistance keeps you feeling disconnected from yourself, Source, others and the flow, and it keeps you “pushing against” your good, not allowing it to come in.

What Resistance Can Look Like in Relation to Your Business

It can be easy to miss some of the signs of resistance affecting your business, because resistance can hide itself behind many, seemingly, innocuous disguises. Some of the obvious and less obvious signs I’ve detected are as follows:

1.   Being in a perpetual apprenticeship/perfecting your craft phase.

Examples are: seeing yourself or your services as “not good enough yet” to fully market and share with the world, or constantly adding new modalities to your toolkit from chronic feelings of insufficiency.

2.   Procrastination/fear about taking action.

This one speaks for itself. It includes deferring decisions and putting off the actions that will help you and your business to progress. Examples are not getting the help you need to grow your business, not implementing your client attraction plan or doing it inconsistently, or not tracking your business budget/finances.

3.   Having a passive rescue mentality and/or magical thinking.

The underlying and, usually, subconscious beliefs related to this are: “I don’t have to send my energy out and serve and take much or any direct inspired action myself to attract/enroll clients. Someone else will do it for me (i.e., bring clients/referrals to me) without me having to do anything, or clients will just land in my lap, as a result of the law of attraction.”

This is often a simplification/misunderstanding of the law of attraction and resistance to consistently implementing an inspired, effective, high-touch, direct client enrollment plan that is guided by Spirit.

4.   Rationalizing why you can’t do what you know will move your business forward, even though you’ve stated that creating a financially viable business is a top priority for you.

This can take some soul-searching because, sometimes, there are other priorities that actually need to come first. Otherwise, if other things are taking precedence that really need to be shifted to a lower priority, it’s important to look at that. Also, if you are continuously saying you don’t have enough time or money to move your business forward, that’s also a red flag.

5.   Being habitually disorganized, forgetful, bored or impatient.

Not having your life and business (including finances) in a reasonably organized state is often a sign of underlying resistance. Forgetting to do things you’ve committed to do or general forgetfulness is also an expression of resistance. Being bored with what you’re doing or impatient about your business growth can also signify resistance.

6.   Having a scattered focus, scattered energy, falling prey to distractions.

This is evident if you’re spending too much time on activities that are not effective in building more immediate, ongoing financial sustainability in your business – e.g., spending excessive and aimless time on social media, checking/reading emails or surfing the internet.

Also, you may be engrossed in time-consuming projects that don’t provide a reasonable return on investment of your time and resources and don’t move your business forward in a significant way. (This is not the same as spending time, in a balanced way, on self-honouring activities that bring you immense joy, while staying focussed on your business objectives.)

How to Respond to Resistance Skillfully

Here are a few tips to help you deal with the many faces of resistance:

1. Be compassionately honest with yourself. Lovingly break through denial and tell yourself the truth about what you are doing and your feelings/fears.

2. Accept where you are and the patterns of resistance you’ve identified affecting your business without self-recrimination and pushing against where you are (creating more resistance).

3. Discern what’s underneath the fears that are driving the resistant behaviours. Look at any false beliefs that may be underpinning these fears and assess if the compulsion for approval, security or control is at play. Gently challenge these beliefs and release yourself from needing approval, security or control (The Sedona Method).

4. Decide you have something valuable to offer right now, without everything having to be ”perfect”. Decide that you are worthy of succeeding and receiving the support you need to succeed, right now.

5. Make your business success a priority and demonstrate this by how you spend your time/work hours. Prioritize your actions and take the actions that will help your business grow consistently first, such as implementing your client enrollment plan, before doing other things.

6. Choose to be courageous and do the things that scare you. Even if you’re still feeling a bit fearful, “feel the fear and do it anyway”. I guarantee (from personal experience) that you’ll find joy, empowerment and results on the other side.

7. Check in with your own guidance to discern how you can process and dissolve your resistance and develop behaviours that open the channels for your business to thrive.

Metaphysical author Florence Scovel Shinn, says, “All power is given to bring heaven upon earth and this is the goal of the Game of Life. The simple rules are fearless faith, non-resistance and love!”

Learning how to respond to resistance, cultivate non-resistance and move forward with fearless faith is a process that starts with learning how to love and accept ourselves and our fears. As we gradually develop mastery in these areas, it becomes easier to express our gifts in the world, allow ourselves to thrive financially and fulfill our greatest destinies, with ease and joy.

In The Prosperous Healer’s Path™ Business Success Program, I help clients identify and learn how to skillfully transform resistant patterns of thought, feeling and behaviour that are blocking them from fully expressing their healing gifts and taking inspired actions that will enable their businesses to grow and thrive.

© Copyright 2014 Mary C. Davis, ANAM TURAS. All rights reserved.

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How Feeling Alone Can Limit Client Attraction and Financial Well-being and What to Do About It

rsz_1aloneness (2)Feeling alone or separate is at the core of the imprint we share in this human experience, and this patterning affects all areas of our lives — including our businesses — until we start waking up (i.e., becoming aware and transforming). Looking back on our childhoods, we can usually gain some insight into how and when this separation pattern was instituted in our lives.

For me, I believe it took root in my pre-school years as a habitual emotional response, that was later reflected in life stories well into adulthood. By the time I was three years old, my sisters were in school, my father was at work or otherwise preoccupied, and I was left to a solitary existence at home, alone, with my mother. Aside from my relationships with my sisters, I had little interaction with other children until I started kindergarten.

At school, I was sensitive, shy and introverted, and I always felt a little different — like I didn’t quite fit in and wasn’t “enough”. How I experienced myself – particularly, in relationship to others – would create a sense of “aloneness” that became an unconscious part of my identity until I started waking up.

As an adult, being a people-pleaser/perfectionist, I “did well” externally in my jobs and career, largely, as the result of abandoning myself in some way in order to fit in, perform and gain approval. What was not working was my relationship with myself and, by extension, the disconnection I felt in my personal and professional relationships. The stress and exhaustion of living and working from a false identity, finally, drove me to quit my job fifteen years ago and start out on my own in my first business as a professional fund raising consultant.

Being a solo entrepreneur, I thought I would avoid the politics and dysfunctional dynamics I was part of when I worked for others. What I came face-to-face with was the aloneness story that had been running in the background of my life for many years. How this was acted out in my new business was through my finances and the struggles I had to attract clients back then.

Today, while the alone program is by no means completely reconciled within me (I’m a work in progress, as we all are), I have made much headway in transforming it, through inner work and support from therapists/healers.  I know how to respond skillfully when it shows up, even in its more subtle forms.

In my work with therapists and wellness professionals, the alone pattern often arises at some point during our work together. When it does, we take steps to heal it, while also developing practical, effective, authentic relationship building (marketing) and offering (sales) processes, because all of these are vital to connection, client attraction and financial well-being.

The Effects of Aloneness on Client Attraction and Finances

Aloneness can be beneficial by helping us to connect with our individuality and explore ourselves, but it needs to be tempered with connection with others. For those of us who are sensitive, aloneness can sometimes be used as a buffer protecting us against dense and/or strong energies around us and environments where these energies prevail. The liability with this pattern is that, in business and life, it can feed disconnection that manifests as a lack of clients, lack of funds, debting, underearning, overspending or workaholism.

The more connected we feel to ourselves, the less alone we feel. When we feel disconnected from ourselves, it is often because we are abandoning or not supporting ourselves. Primarily, we do this by judging ourselves, ignoring our own needs (focussing on others’ needs over our own) and repressing or denying our feelings. Judging ourselves is often mirrored in how we judge others, and this separates and disconnects.

From this place, it is difficult to create balanced, meaningful connections and, in the case of our businesses, it is difficult to reach out and create relationships with clients and prospective clients in authentic and healthy ways.

Without awareness, a lack of clients or money can affirm the false belief that we are alone, weird or different and reinforce feelings of separation and disconnection. This is why it’s important to recognize these circumstances, simply, as a symptom of a false belief/feeling pattern, rather than validation of a “truth”.

Ways to Transform the Alone Program

“Ultimately, what we are looking to is the deepest connection within ourselves. As we get more connected to that, we begin to feel in harmony with other people and with the rest of the world.”
                                                                                              — Shakti Gawain

Like all transformation, healing the “alone” pattern takes awareness and patience and is a process that starts with the desire, willingness, commitment and courage to change. Here are some tips and coaching questions to support you with this process:

1) Discern how the alone program may be playing out in your healing business and your life and to what degree. How may it be manifesting in your finances and business? What triggers feelings of aloneness for you?

2) Aloneness is a core feeling and can be felt, habitually, in the body. Where do you feel it in your body, and what does it feel like? What does it look like? What does it sound like?

3) Once you’ve developed an awareness of the feeling of aloneness in your body, you will be able to more easily spot it when it arises and allow yourself to release it. A simple and powerful releasing tool is The Sedona Method, which uses an inquiry process. “Could you allow the feeling of aloneness to be here? Could you let it go? Would you let it go? When?” The Sedona Method also addresses and reconciles basic wants such as the want to be separate (alone) and the want to be one (connected) – polarities that can keep us spinning mentally and emotionally.

4) Work on clearing your judgements about yourself and others. Byron Katie’s The Work inquiry process and Judge Your Neighbour/Judge Yourself worksheets are favourite tools of mine for this.

5) Visualize yourself connecting heart-to-heart, authentically (i.e., being yourself) with prospective clients and professional partners, listen for inspiration/Higher guidance about how to do this, then take action to reach out.

As we develop ways to support ourselves, such as doing this inner work and changing habitual mental and emotional responses, we feel more connected and less alone. This enables us to connect easily and joyfully with prospective clients, draw in the clients we’re meant to serve, have healthy and balanced relationships with them and enjoy satisfying, creative and financially abundant businesses.

In The Prosperous Healer™ Inner Mastery Sessions, I help clients access the habitual mental and emotional patterning of aloneness and other programs that are affecting their ability to attract clients and flourish financially, de-link and release the neuro-net pathways of those patterns and install a new, healthy, embodied sense of connection with themselves and others.

If you are interested in finding out more about this service, please contact me at

© Copyright 2014-2016 Mary C. Davis, ANAM TURAS. All rights reserved.

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Also, feel free to submit your thoughts about this topic in the form below.  I’d love to hear them!

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How to Name Your Services to Attract Clients

rsz_1namingservicestoattract (2)Question:

“I’ve come to the realization that what I’m offering in terms of my services looks the same as what other practitioners in my community are offering, at least in terms of the names of the services. I’m not sure if this is the reason I’m having difficulty attracting clients.  Your thoughts?”


© Copyright 2014 Mary C. Davis, ANAM TURAS. All rights reserved.

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How to Tap Into Our Core Energy to Create Thriving Businesses With Ease and Joy

rsz_1core_energyI received a perfectly-timed gift from my sister-in-law, when she presented me with a most warm and nourishing jasper stone.  Since we’re constantly being guided and supported, this was no arbitrary gift.  As I sensed and felt the healing properties of this stone and went online to validate and explore this further, I discovered that jasper is ideal for tapping into one’s core – that inner Source of bountiful creativity and abundant physical and psychic energy.

The reason the timing of this gift was so perfect is because shifting to the ease and joy paradigm has been one of the operating principles of my business from the beginning, and as I embark on new phases, my understanding and embodiment of this principle evolves.  A new phase had commenced last fall, and the beginning of this year heralded opportunities and signals to practice balance and to create my business (and my life) from my core more intentionally and expansively than ever before.

Interestingly, “staying balanced and energized while serving clients” and “not having our energy output in serving others come at a personal expense to ourselves” are e-zine topics that clients have recently submitted to me.  Clearly, it’s time to move away from the prevailing models of working, running businesses, and being “helping professionals”, because they’re destructive and life-depleting.  These models foster a disconnection from our core energy, because they prize efforting, struggling, straining, draining and sacrificing ourselves in order to serve others and/or a cause, to build our work and businesses and to meet our material needs.  The exciting truth is that we can learn how to tap into our core energy and develop our businesses from a place of greater vitality, creativity, ease and joy.

Our Core Energy: The Boundless Source Within

American psychologist Abraham Maslow’s groundbreaking research on self-actualizing people provided remarkable insights about those who live from their core energy.  He discovered that these individuals are amongst the happiest, healthiest, most creative and energetic people in the world.  He also concluded that self-actualizers cherish and embody qualities such as simplicity, wholeness, sufficiency, effortlessness, truth, honesty and uniqueness.

Serving others and creating and growing our businesses, with ease and joy, require cultivation of these values and our natural self-actualizing tendencies, so we can strengthen our connection to our core energy.  By fortifying these propensities, we more easily transform fear-based patterns and behaviours, our lives and businesses flow more, and we feel happier, freer and more fulfilled.   We embark on a process of continuous energy release, growth and unfolding of potential.

Attuning to Our Core Energy

The place to begin with attuning to our core energy is to value ourselves and live our lives and operate our businesses in ways that demonstrate this.  On this basis, we can learn to live from our core energy using these practices, processes and tools:

1) Consciously track energy drains, discern what needs to change, and get help with this.

Energy drains can block our connection to our core energy.  However, our emotions, triggers and reactive patterns provide feedback about where we’re “leaking” our energy and can point us to the underlying causes. Amongst these are our “shadow” patterns and behaviours, codependent inner and outer reactions, unresolved childhood wounding and unresolved traumas.  Doing our inner work through psychotherapy, energy and spiritual healing can help us bring our energy “back to ourselves”, resolve these patterns and behaviours and become “fully functioning” people.  We develop assertiveness (one of the characteristics of self-actualizers) and healthy inner and outer boundaries that “contain” our energy.

2) Wear, meditate with and/or tune into the jasper stone.

According to Rodika Tchi ( Feng Shui), jasper will benefit us if we need more energy, vitality and determination to pursue our goals.  “This stone helps you understand that you can stay committed and determined without exhausting yourself or ruining your health  … and is especially helpful for people who easily burn out.  It will help achieve a subtle balance between giving and receiving and can teach how to stay balanced and replenish the inner energy resources.”

3) Nurture ourselves physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. 

We can easily slip into habits that ignore our physical needs.  It’s important to eat a nutritious diet, drink plenty of water, exercise and condition our bodies and get adequate sleep and rest.

Besides this, I’ve found that  learning how to relax my body into the feeling of effortlessness has been vitally important, because when my body relaxes, my mind and emotions relax, too, and I feel connected.  In Zen and the Art of Archery, the author, Eugen Herrigel, learned that changing the way he breathed so that it was deeper induced greater relaxation, increased his strength, energy and power and improved his external performance.

For me, this has translated into a practice in moment-by-moment awareness and relaxing my body using full breathing, as much as possible, especially in the midst of activity and interactions with clients and other people.  I’ve been honing my ability to notice and release the sometimes subtle tension patterns that “to do” lists, others needs in relation to me, and my needs in relation to others can trigger.

4) Invoke and practice embodying qualities that connect us with our core energy.

As mentioned, self-actualizers embody qualities such as simplicity, wholeness, sufficiency, effortlessness, ease, joy, truth, honesty and uniqueness.  To start to embody these qualities more, we can pick the qualities we’d like to experience and imitate them.  What does embodying these qualities feel, sound and look like?  We can pick one quality at a time and practice feeling, speaking and moving/acting like this quality for a day, a week or a month.  Then, we can continue the practice with the other qualities.

Attuning to our core energy is a necessity for change makers, like you and me, if we are to carry out our sacred mission and purpose.  As we integrate the intentions and implement the practices that help us attune to our core energy, we deepen the sense of ease and joy with which we serve others and create our businesses, while harnessing the energy we need to thrive and expand into our greatest potential as Prosperous Healers.

In The Prosperous Healer™ Inner Mastery Sessions, using spiritual self-healing processes, I help clients attune to their core energy by:

* releasing patterns of resistance that create suffering for them and make it difficult to authentically express themselves and experience their businesses/work/lives with consistent simplicity, ease and joy;

* developing and embodying a more integrated, loving and whole sense of themselves, so they can bring forth their greatest gifts and serve others and the world in healthy ways;

* unifying their inner female and male energies, so they can enjoy a more balanced, functional and optimally creative way of being in their lives and businesses; and

* bringing peace and harmony to their relationships with themselves, others, money, work, business and life.

If you are interested in finding out more about this service, please contact me at

© Copyright 2014-2016 Mary C. Davis, ANAM TURAS. All rights reserved.

If you like this post, please click the “like” button below and share it with your friends.  Thank you.

Also, feel free to submit your thoughts about this topic in the form below.  I’d love to hear them!

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How to Use an Inspiring Campaign to Attract Clients and Build Your Business

rsz_inspiring_campaign 1When I was a professional fund raising executive, I worked on a number of “capital campaigns”, which are intensive initiatives designed to raise significant funds (millions of dollars) for building acquisitions, construction, renovations and/or equipment for not-for-profit organizations.

Aside from the actual dollars raised, these campaigns increased public awareness about specific causes, raised the organizations’ visibility and reputations in their communities, reaffirmed and increased existing donors’ financial commitments, attracted new donors and built a support base of loyal volunteers.

Important components of success for these initiatives were relationship-building and collaboration, as well as conveying a vision and brand for each campaign that galvanized action and participation.

For wellness professionals and therapists who want to use inspiring, authentic, collaborative approaches to attract clients and build their businesses, the campaign concept can be adapted to great effect.

5 Steps to Creating Your Own Inspiring Campaign

Using your own creativity and inspiration, you can design an inspiring campaign as a “high-touch” way of raising your business’s profile and attracting clients, while supporting others. Here are five steps to launch your campaign:

1. If you haven’t already done so, create a “signature” talk or workshop.

Your signature talk or workshop will be the foundation of your campaign. This is a high-value presentation that captures your core, unique message and gives your audience a taste of your work. It also speaks to your authentic community’s (i.e., target market’s) core challenge and offers information, tools and resources to address this challenge. If one of your paid offerings is a core service or program for your authentic community, your signature talk or workshop can provide some highlights from this program.

2. Using your Inner Guidance, come up with an inspiring campaign name that ties in with your brand name.

This may also reflect your authentic community, your core message and the “Higher Purpose or Vision” of your business and, if this works, the concept of giving back to the community. For example, my brand name is “The Prosperous Healer”. The name of my inspiring campaign is, “Spread the Love and Prosperity: A Community Give-Back and Empowerment Campaign for Wellness Professionals, Holistic Practitioners and Therapists”.

3. Create a flyer for your signature presentation/inspiring campaign.

Your main promotional tool for your campaign will be a one-page flyer with the title, logo, description and benefits of your signature talk/workshop, who it is for, date/location/time/cost, a sentence that positions your signature talk/workshop as part of your inspiring campaign, your bio and headshot.

4. Set a fee that will be donated, partially or fully, to a local charity.

This is part of the “community give-back” approach. If you’re doing a one-hour signature talk, you could charge a nominal fee such as $10 – $20 per person. If you’re doing a half-day workshop, you could donate a percentage of your total fee for your workshop to a specific charity. By charging for the event, you’re raising money for a worthy cause and giving participants the opportunity to affirm their abundance and generosity, as well as acknowledge that they are receiving something of value.

5. Approach prospective partners and invite their participation.

Visualize connecting easily and enjoyably with businesses, organizations, groups and individuals involved with or also serving your authentic community. Then open to where your guidance leads you, as you research and identify these prospective partners. Start with the ones you already know, while also doing outreach to build relationships with ones you don’t yet know.

The best way to approach prospective partners that you don’t know is either in person or by phone and explain who you are, that you have undertaken a community give-back campaign, a little bit about the campaign and your signature talk/workshop, and that you’d like to invite their participation as hosts.

Be sure to clarify that as hosts, they would promote the event to their clients/supporters/contacts, host the event at their location and that you would provide them with everything they need to do so.

Highlight what the benefits to them would be for hosting, such as choosing the charitable recipient for the funds raised, raising their own profile and, potentially, attracting new contacts, clients or supporters themselves.   Additionally, if guided, you can offer to explore other means of providing them with value and support in exchange for their participation.

Quadruple-Win Benefits

Creating an inspiring campaign is truly an abundance-based marketing approach that results in multiple blessings for all:

1) The local charitable organizations that are the financial beneficiaries of your signature presentation events receive funds and increased public awareness about their causes.

2) The hosts get to be of service to friends, colleagues, customers, clients, supporters, and the charitable organizations they select to receive the event proceeds, raise their own profiles and attract new business and contacts.   Also, they receive compensation in the form of whatever valuable exchange you’ve collaboratively determined.

3) The event participants benefit from a fabulous experience, valuable information and resources and tools that will help them with the challenges you specialize in addressing.

4) You benefit from the direct, personal exposure to your authentic community members and the opportunity to build your business in a very inspiring, heart-centered, effective, low-cost, leveraged way.

When you allow Spirit to inspire your campaign, you are of great service to others, while putting your message and healing gifts out powerfully and attracting clients in an elegant, enjoyable and deeply gratifying way.

In The Prosperous Healer’s Path™ Business Success Program, I teach and coach participants on how to develop and use a signature talk/workshop as part of an effective client enrollment process and an inspiring campaign that serves others and the world.

© Copyright 2013 Mary C. Davis, ANAM TURAS. All rights reserved.

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How to Package Multiple Services in a Coherent, Client-Attractive Way


rsz_1packaging“My weakest area, I believe, is packaging my multi-service story practice in a coherent way for my audience of conscious professionals seeking a fresh and inspired approach to their personal or business challenge. As I also offer trainings in workplace stress reduction and team building, I also need help pricing my services for non-profits and companies.”


© Copyright 2013 Mary C. Davis, ANAM TURAS. All rights reserved.

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How to Maintain Focus and Momentum With Your Business


“The challenge I’m currently dealing with is maintaining momentum and focus toward my business goals. I get distracted easily. On top of that, if I don’t see immediate results, I tend to get deflated and, then, lose my focus and procrastinate on continuing to take the actions I need to take.”


© Copyright 2013 Mary C. Davis, ANAM TURAS. All rights reserved.

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Also, feel free to submit your thoughts about this topic in the form below.  I’d love to hear them!

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Clearing the Healer’s Shadow Will Help You Prosper

rsz_shadowOver the past few weeks, I’ve pulled the same oracle cards, urging me to have a “life review” and take ”quiet time” to celebrate what I’ve learned and transformed and to identify and continue releasing patterns of thought, emotion and behaviour that aren’t serving me. Accompanying this has been that undeniable urge from within to have a closer look at the more remote landscapes of my psyche.

As I trekked inward, I was directed to circle back over some well-known territory, where I discovered new layers of familiar themes presenting themselves (a phenomenon that’s often discussed in the spiritual/self-growth arena). In the past, I would have been too embarrassed or ashamed to admit to myself – let alone to you – that these particular themes have been part of my experience. They’re aspects of my “shadow”, after all, and rather than seeing this as simply the “unknown” or “unconscious” part of myself, I would have experienced my shadow and its contents as shame-inducing flaws I’d want to hide. There’s a reason Jungian analysts call shame “the swampland of the soul”!

Yet, I’ve had deeply healing experiences from exposing that unconscious part of myself, compassionately, to the light of day. The ongoing practice of bringing awareness to and clearing the seemingly infinite layers of my shadow has had a profoundly liberating effect on my business and life. You may relate to some or, perhaps, all of the themes I present here. My hope is that sharing them with you will support your own inner process and open you to more freedom and flow.

Dominant Patterns That Lurk in the Healer’s Shadow

As is often the case, the patterns or themes I’ve been progressively transforming in myself are what I’ve been helping many of the healers I work with to transform as well. Without intending to generalize, these seem to be the most common ones:

1.  Spiritual bypassing

I became aware that I was using spiritual concepts, affirmations, truths and practices as a form of mood alteration or “metaphysical valium” to anaesthetize and avoid painful, uncomfortable feelings. What I’ve now trained myself to do is to relate to what’s living inside me, first, in a grounded, embodied way, allowing the feelings to be felt, seen and heard and the hidden thought patterns to emerge. Then, with awareness and discernment, I use the wise, unconditionally loving parts of myself to support transformation and healing, using a spiritual/metaphysical process or tool.

2.  Avoiding/suppressing feelings

The feelings I was avoiding fully experiencing through spiritual bypassing were feelings of shame, aloneness and anger. Examples: feeling insufficient, flawed, not enough; feelings of being separate, alone and not belonging; and of course, anger, because of the program I’ve carried that “nice” girls/women and “spiritual people” don’t get angry (it would be a sign that I’m seriously “unevolved”, after all!).

3.  Feeling/believing I have to be perfect, know it all, have all the answers and have it all together — or at least, come across this way (wear a mask, in other words)

I jokingly call this my “I have arrived” mask, and I know that it comes from scarcity programs and my shame swampland (which I’ve come to befriend and love…swampland is seriously undervalued real estate!).

4.  Feeling/believing that if I have weaknesses, imperfections and vulnerabilities and others see these, no one will like me or approve of me, and clients will think I have nothing of value to offer them and will “fire” me

Of course, this is the flip side of #3 and also comes from shame. The false premise is that to have something of value to bring to others, I have to be at that illusory, fairy tale “I have arrived, I’m perfect, I’m master of the universe” place. The wise woman in me knows this to be patently untrue, because the most valuable external support and wisdom I’ve received has, repeatedly, come from people who are refreshingly real, open and self-accepting about their weaknesses, “imperfections” and vulnerability.

5.  Feeling overly-responsible for clients’ and loved ones’ challenges, well-being, progress and outcomes

Having some codependent patterns and, also, a genuine desire to be of service, the transformation for me has been learning to “stay in my own business”, as Byron Katie would say, while still being supportive. In other words, having healthy inner and outer boundaries around my role as a “helper” and continuing to lovingly support others, in a balanced way, while being detached about their journeys and outcomes.

6.  Caretaking and people pleasing

These tendencies can be enmeshed with many of the above patterns. What I discovered was that for me, caretaking is a behaviour to compensate for feeling unworthy and to gain others’ approval. People pleasing alleviates my fear of being shamed, rejected and left alone for displeasing others. The transformation has been building the knowing of my innate worthiness, regardless of what I do or don’t do for others, what I say or don’t say or how others react to me.

7.  Weak/unclear boundaries

Whenever I have weak or unclear boundaries, it’s usually an indication that #5 and/or #6 have been activated for me. The antidote is always to check in with what I’m really feeling and needing, own my own needs, communicate them to others in a loving way, without guilt or apology, and say “no”, when necessary.

8.  Martyrdom – setting aside my own needs in the name of compassion or the service of others

Like all of the above, this can definitely be a symptom of spiritual bypassing for me, and it’s intimately connected with #7. I’ve learned, through direct experience, that this is an unbalanced dynamic that serves no one and is a recipe for burn-out.

9.  Need for recognition and approval from outside of myself

This is another response to feelings that come up in me of shame and aloneness. What helps immensely, once I’ve allowed myself to feel the feelings and identify the thoughts, is doing processing work around the polarities of approval and disapproval. This exposes the unconscious “stuff” behind those polarities and allows it to dissipate.

10.  Need for control and security

This is a typical response when I’m feeling fearful about some external “situation” that’s triggering feelings of insecurity and anxiety. What works well for me is feeling the feelings fully in my body, looking at my thoughts about the situation, asking myself “Whose business am I in?” (à la Byron Katie), re-erecting my mental boundaries and practicing the art of surrender, with tools like The One Command®.

The greatest gifts the continuous practice of acknowledging and clearing my shadow has brought me is a deepening of self-love and self-acceptance and an increased empathy for others. It has taught me that no amount of meditation, yoga, affirmations or other spiritual practices can provide inner freedom and prosperity, if not consciously integrated with exploring, embracing and clearing the hidden topography of my inner world.

In The One Command® private sessions, I help clients access the hidden mental and emotional patterns locked into the cells and DNA of their bodies that aren’t serving them in their businesses and lives, de-link the neuro-net pathways of those patterns and use the creative power within them to install a new, embodied understanding of prosperity and flow.

© Copyright 2013 Mary C. Davis, ANAM TURAS. All rights reserved.

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Who Are Your Preferred Clients?


rsz_welcome-new-client-handshake“I’m feeling frustrated that I’m attracting some clients from my niche who are less than ideal.  They don’t seem invested in our work together.  It feels like they’re looking for a ‘quick fix’ and are not willing to take responsibility for themselves, for whatever reasons.

I know this sounds disrespectful in some ways, but I’ve taken to calling them dabblers.  I sincerely want to help, but I feel like they’re not really committed to their own well-being, and I can’t do my best work with them and get the results I know are possible.  To be honest, after a while, I don’t feel much joy working with them.”


© Copyright 2013-2016 Mary C. Davis, ANAM TURAS. All rights reserved.

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Four Manifestation Tips for Your Business

rsz_1moneyfallingfromskyWhen I was in my early 20s, I had what I believe were my first truly conscious experiences of manifestation and flow. I had spent a year working after my university graduation to save money for a six-month backpacking trip through Europe. When I was four and a half months into the trip, it was apparent that my financial reserves were dwindling, and it looked like I wouldn’t have the resources to finish the journey.

Despite this, I was determined to complete my itinerary and continued joyfully travelling in full faith that everything would work out. I was having such a great time! This fearless faith and conscious connection to my invisible supply resulted in all sorts of seeming miracles. I was given food and shelter by friends and people I met along the way, my uncles in Ireland both gave me money, unexpectedly, after a visit with them, and I was able to hitchhike to all the remaining destinations I wanted to visit.

My final “demonstrations” that the Universe had my back occurred when I was completely out of money in London, and a friend gifted me the money to get to the airport to fly home as a “thank you” for making dinner. When I got to Gatwick Airport, I was put on a standby list and told by several other backpackers that they had been trying, unsuccessfully, to fly home on standby every day for the previous three weeks. In spite of this, I felt calm and confident. All of us on the standby list got onto the flight back to Canada that day, and what a party it was on the return journey!

Since that time, my embodied understanding of spiritual prosperity principles has deepened (and continues to deepen), resulting in innumerable demonstrations of flow in my life. The realization of these principles has helped me manifest many material and non-material blessings, including the creation of a prosperous, purposeful, fulfilling business I love, that supports me and allows me to be of service and express my greatest gifts.

What I’ve Learned About Allowing the Flow

The realization of spiritual truths about prosperity cannot occur in our businesses if we don’t, also, take steps to consciously investigate and process our dualistic, shadow beliefs, thoughts and feelings about money, business, marketing and selling and our limiting identity attachments. These patterns create blocks to manifesting, receiving and self-realization.

As we process these shadow patterns, we become more effective at embodying and applying prosperity teachings in our businesses. Here are some principles and tips you can apply right away, to allow the flow:

1.  Break the worry/fear habit: take your focus off external conditions.

Are you looking at a bank balance that appears to be small and wondering how you’re going to make ends meet? Are you getting anxious because your business is not attracting the number of clients you’d like? Are you looking at your present circumstances and starting to panic and think you’ll never get your business into a thriving position?

As challenging as this may be, resist the inclination to “judge by appearances”. Metaphysician Florence Scovel Shinn says, “Do not be fooled by the darkness before the dawn”. Don’t be discouraged by seemingly bleak conditions, as they merely signify the “breakdown” before the “breakthrough”.

2.  Claim your creative power.

You and the Creative Principle of the Universe are one and the same. Make conscious contact with the Creative Principle and your good/supply, on a daily basis, through the spoken word. Prosperity teacher Catherine Ponder says, “It is through the spoken word of prosperity that your words move on that invisible substance, form it as definite results, and give birth to it in the visible world.”

Find a statement of truth for prosperity that resonates for you, and use it. Better yet, formulate it into a command, go to the theta brain wave state where you automatically connect with the Creative Principle within you and make your command. (The One Command® and theta brain wave manifesting are highly effective).

3.  Detach, prepare for your good and follow your intuition.

If you look back on your life, you’ll notice that the goals that were easiest for you to attain were the ones you felt completely relaxed and detached about. You can cultivate this sense of surrender/detachment by using the Sedona Method® and consciously letting go of any desires for approval, security or control associated with the fulfillment of your goals.

In this relaxed state of being, you can prepare for your good by moving forward fearlessly, following your intuitive leads and taking inspired actions that demonstrate trust that your goals will be fulfilled and your supply will manifest “into the visible world”. Expect your good to manifest, and act accordingly.

4.  Look for and celebrate the “evidence” and express gratitude.

Gently watch for the demonstrations of your good. Sometimes, we’re “asleep” and don’t notice that we’re actually inundated with evidence of the fulfillment of our needs and desires. Or, often, before the complete fulfillment of a goal, we’ll get what looks like a partial or seemingly “imperfect” manifestation. Don’t be discouraged, but rather, celebrate this as evidence that your good is on its way to you.

Notice all the signs and demonstrations, write them down in a success journal, celebrate them and give thanks. I have a gratitude rattle I love to shake, thanking Source whenever I receive a demonstration of my good, no matter how “small”. I even shake it when presented with a challenge, affirming gratitude for the solution, which I know is forthcoming.

When we own our power as Prosperous Healers, we experience direct knowledge that we are one with Infinite Intelligence, that Infinite Intelligence supplies every need and that the true source of our good, material and otherwise, is our realization of these truths.

Through a dynamic process of coaching, teaching and energy/spiritual healing, clients who work with me release fears and doubts about themselves, their businesses and financial situations and develop a stronger connection with their Source Mind, tapping into their innate, creative ability to manifest the results they want in their businesses and lives.

To explore how we can collaborate together to bring forth your greatest gifts and express them through a thriving, purposeful business that serves others and the world, contact me at and visit .

© Copyright 2013-2016 Mary C. Davis, ANAM TURAS. All rights reserved.

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