When I was in my early 20s, I spent almost two weeks in bed paralyzed with fear about a pending six-month backpacking trip to Europe, wondering if I should postpone or cancel it. As it was an independent trip where I would be travelling for three months alone (and the rest of the time with my boyfriend), I was petrified about all the uncertainties. Where would I stay? How would I get around? How would I make my backpacker’s budget stretch over six months? I had never gone on such an extensive trip and had never been to countries where English was not the native language.
I went ahead with the trip as planned and, of course, everything not only worked out fine … everything worked out fabulously! I had a blast, and I absolutely loved travelling as a backpacker. It was one of the best things I ever did, as well as subsequent trips.
Thankfully, since that time, I’ve never had to spend a few weeks in bed due to anxiety. Yet, I have experienced numerous other situations where I’ve felt vulnerable and terrified about doing something that felt “risky” and uncertain, including creating two businesses. What I’ve learned (and continue to learn) is how to spot and work through the fears driving different resistant patterns and behaviours that can affect me and my business growth.
From my own experiences and witnessing my clients’ journeys, I’ve been able to discern how the different faces of resistance manifest and their common effects. When these patterns are left unaddressed, they can keep you in a suspended state, avoiding the inspired actions that will allow you and your business to thrive or cause you to take these actions half-heartedly or ineffectively. Ultimately, unresolved resistance keeps you feeling disconnected from yourself, Source, others and the flow, and it keeps you “pushing against” your good, not allowing it to come in.
What Resistance Can Look Like in Relation to Your Business
It can be easy to miss some of the signs of resistance affecting your business, because resistance can hide itself behind many, seemingly, innocuous disguises. Some of the obvious and less obvious signs I’ve detected are as follows:
1. Being in a perpetual apprenticeship/perfecting your craft phase.
Examples are: seeing yourself or your services as “not good enough yet” to fully market and share with the world, or constantly adding new modalities to your toolkit from chronic feelings of insufficiency.
2. Procrastination/fear about taking action.
This one speaks for itself. It includes deferring decisions and putting off the actions that will help you and your business to progress. Examples are not getting the help you need to grow your business, not implementing your client attraction plan or doing it inconsistently, or not tracking your business budget/finances.
3. Having a passive rescue mentality and/or magical thinking.
The underlying and, usually, subconscious beliefs related to this are: “I don’t have to send my energy out and serve and take much or any direct inspired action myself to attract/enroll clients. Someone else will do it for me (i.e., bring clients/referrals to me) without me having to do anything, or clients will just land in my lap, as a result of the law of attraction.”
This is often a simplification/misunderstanding of the law of attraction and resistance to consistently implementing an inspired, effective, high-touch, direct client enrollment plan that is guided by Spirit.
4. Rationalizing why you can’t do what you know will move your business forward, even though you’ve stated that creating a financially viable business is a top priority for you.
This can take some soul-searching because, sometimes, there are other priorities that actually need to come first. Otherwise, if other things are taking precedence that really need to be shifted to a lower priority, it’s important to look at that. Also, if you are continuously saying you don’t have enough time or money to move your business forward, that’s also a red flag.
5. Being habitually disorganized, forgetful, bored or impatient.
Not having your life and business (including finances) in a reasonably organized state is often a sign of underlying resistance. Forgetting to do things you’ve committed to do or general forgetfulness is also an expression of resistance. Being bored with what you’re doing or impatient about your business growth can also signify resistance.
6. Having a scattered focus, scattered energy, falling prey to distractions.
This is evident if you’re spending too much time on activities that are not effective in building more immediate, ongoing financial sustainability in your business – e.g., spending excessive and aimless time on social media, checking/reading emails or surfing the internet.
Also, you may be engrossed in time-consuming projects that don’t provide a reasonable return on investment of your time and resources and don’t move your business forward in a significant way. (This is not the same as spending time, in a balanced way, on self-honouring activities that bring you immense joy, while staying focussed on your business objectives.)
How to Respond to Resistance Skillfully
Here are a few tips to help you deal with the many faces of resistance:
1. Be compassionately honest with yourself. Lovingly break through denial and tell yourself the truth about what you are doing and your feelings/fears.
2. Accept where you are and the patterns of resistance you’ve identified affecting your business without self-recrimination and pushing against where you are (creating more resistance).
3. Discern what’s underneath the fears that are driving the resistant behaviours. Look at any false beliefs that may be underpinning these fears and assess if the compulsion for approval, security or control is at play. Gently challenge these beliefs and release yourself from needing approval, security or control (The Sedona Method).
4. Decide you have something valuable to offer right now, without everything having to be ”perfect”. Decide that you are worthy of succeeding and receiving the support you need to succeed, right now.
5. Make your business success a priority and demonstrate this by how you spend your time/work hours. Prioritize your actions and take the actions that will help your business grow consistently first, such as implementing your client enrollment plan, before doing other things.
6. Choose to be courageous and do the things that scare you. Even if you’re still feeling a bit fearful, “feel the fear and do it anyway”. I guarantee (from personal experience) that you’ll find joy, empowerment and results on the other side.
7. Check in with your own guidance to discern how you can process and dissolve your resistance and develop behaviours that open the channels for your business to thrive.
Metaphysical author Florence Scovel Shinn, says, “All power is given to bring heaven upon earth and this is the goal of the Game of Life. The simple rules are fearless faith, non-resistance and love!”
Learning how to respond to resistance, cultivate non-resistance and move forward with fearless faith is a process that starts with learning how to love and accept ourselves and our fears. As we gradually develop mastery in these areas, it becomes easier to express our gifts in the world, allow ourselves to thrive financially and fulfill our greatest destinies, with ease and joy.
In The Prosperous Healer’s Path™ Business Success Program, I help clients identify and learn how to skillfully transform resistant patterns of thought, feeling and behaviour that are blocking them from fully expressing their healing gifts and taking inspired actions that will enable their businesses to grow and thrive.
© Copyright 2014 Mary C. Davis, ANAM TURAS. All rights reserved.
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